Thursday, January 29, 2009

Its all about playing safe

were friends and yup, that’s basically it.

Some actually think that we have “something” Some might say that we have a mutual understanding. But the answer? None of those. Its just that he’s the kind of person that you can easily talk to and very easy to please by the way. Thats the reason why we became this close.
Somebody told me that its very hard to tell what I think or feel. That’s true. In fact, I can conceal my emotions without even trying.  So, what do I think? Here let me tell you.
So first off, he makes me feel special. ( Not all the time though) Im not quite sure of what he thinks about me either. Sometimes I feel that he acts like a boyfriend, I dont know. Yes, he can be sweet sometimes, but he is like that to everybody. Im confused.
On my end, he is special to me. Its hard to explain but let me try okay? Its not that I love him, like has a big difference with love. And I do get jealous too, when he starts to talk about other girls. (yikes) He’s special in a way that he’s in the middle of a friend and a special someone. Just in the middle. Maybe because im holding back and he’s holding back. I have my reasons he has his reasons. talk about playing safe huh?
People are actually wishing, and hoping for us to be together. But I dont know. I havent thought about it. Dont they think that It’ll just make things complicated?

And Im not really sure if we have something to start over with. 
Why is he like that? Here’s my very own conclusions.

1. Maybe he’s just like that because he misses the feeling of having “someone” and having me around reminds him of that feeling. He misses the feeling but he really doesnt want to be committed. He has a point. This is a win-win situation for him. Iam there when he needs me but he can stop whenever he wants to. No promises, no hassles, easy way out.  Which is I find very unfair. First of all, why start something you have no intentions of finishing? Why would you let someone fall for you if you only want friendship? Sounds selfish? you decide for yourself.

2. Or maybe, he simply likes me. 

So the bottomline is, do I want us to be together?  Im curious. What would it feel like? But does being curious mean that I do?…

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